I struggle.... I really do.
Sometimes I just think its better for me to shut up. Some blessings are given easily, some blessings have to be wrestled for. Nevertheless, its never about me or my merits. He chooses to give.
When He witholds, when He's silent, when He TAKES AWAY, do i dare to still say I surrender/trust/obey Him? It's easy to be a Christian, easy to say the airy fairy words when things are going one's way.
What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ
Am I even close to that?
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