Winning isnt everything.
After all, we are already more than conquerors.
Good job, brothers.
Good game.
Saturday, April 29
The Nerd
Some people think that the nerd is smart, but in actual fact, he isnt.
Deep down he wishes he was smart.
Even though the nerd always uses his mind and brain, deep down the nerd has a heart.
A heart that is fragile and easily broken.
He is easily disappointed but people just cant tell.
Thus the nerd hides his feelings. Feelings he has problems expressing and so he even hides them more. He hides them behind his glasses and his smile.
The nerd has problems with words, so he hides what he really wants to say behind jokes, scientific jargon and he seldom opens up.
The nerd has his own dreams. Dreams that people will laugh at and since he knows that, he holds on to his dreams even more tightly.
The nerd follows his heart
The nerd believes
The nerd has faith
and
The nerd knows that his imperfectness and flaws will be made his strength by who he believes in.
therefore
the nerd prays
Deep down he wishes he was smart.
Even though the nerd always uses his mind and brain, deep down the nerd has a heart.
A heart that is fragile and easily broken.
He is easily disappointed but people just cant tell.
Thus the nerd hides his feelings. Feelings he has problems expressing and so he even hides them more. He hides them behind his glasses and his smile.
The nerd has problems with words, so he hides what he really wants to say behind jokes, scientific jargon and he seldom opens up.
The nerd has his own dreams. Dreams that people will laugh at and since he knows that, he holds on to his dreams even more tightly.
The nerd follows his heart
The nerd believes
The nerd has faith
and
The nerd knows that his imperfectness and flaws will be made his strength by who he believes in.
therefore
the nerd prays
Before
Exhaustion, pain, passion, adrenaline, the rush of excitement.... let it all come back to me.
Even if it's only for 30 minutes.
Even if it's only for 30 minutes.
Friday, April 28
The Road Ahead
Is it my fault?
There's no such thing as smooth sailing for me.
Things never go as i would i like them to.
The road ahead and before is always so dark.
Am i being selfish?
I can and will look out for others but Who's looking out for me?
When i fall, will it be a long tumble down the abyss? I shudder to think of it.
Am i being selfish??
Is it wrong to look out for myself?
Surrender.
Submit.
I struggle with that.
There's no such thing as smooth sailing for me.
Things never go as i would i like them to.
The road ahead and before is always so dark.
Am i being selfish?
I can and will look out for others but Who's looking out for me?
When i fall, will it be a long tumble down the abyss? I shudder to think of it.
Am i being selfish??
Is it wrong to look out for myself?
Surrender.
Submit.
I struggle with that.
Wednesday, April 26
Support
Sad is the man who falls and has nobody to pick him up.
Solid, capable and reliable?
It's always good to have affirmation, a nod from someone else, the thumbs up from a teamate.
But even the most capable and reliable people have their own struggles. Their own inner fears and turmoil that they go through.
A close confidant, someone who supports and listens to one's troubles would be nice. Afterall, sometimes it just feels so lonely on the battlefield.
Solid, capable and reliable?
It's always good to have affirmation, a nod from someone else, the thumbs up from a teamate.
But even the most capable and reliable people have their own struggles. Their own inner fears and turmoil that they go through.
A close confidant, someone who supports and listens to one's troubles would be nice. Afterall, sometimes it just feels so lonely on the battlefield.
Sunday, April 23
Bittersweet
"Everybody's looking for intimacy..."
Something i doodled out while watching bleach. Hopefully that explains what i havent been blogging much. Been a while since i sat down and drawn something. It was refreshing to say the least.
Oh well. That's all for now
Tuesday, April 11
Simply
Hmm i writing this with a head full of wet hair, unable to go to sleep even though there's a test the following morning.
Oh how we love to complicate our lives. We ask so many questions, but do we ever wait and listen for an answer? We knock, but do we ever wait for the door to be opened? We seek, but do we hang around to find?
Sometimes the answers are staring right at us. Yet we do not know. We hope to do great things, but sometimes all he wants is the simple things to be done. We want divine revelation, but sometimes all he wants is a childlike faith. We want miraculous signs, but sometimes all he asks for us to know him better.
Maybe the oh so great and grand scheme that I envision God to have planned for me is just something very normal yet so powerful and beautiful, that is to pray.
Oh how we love to complicate our lives. We ask so many questions, but do we ever wait and listen for an answer? We knock, but do we ever wait for the door to be opened? We seek, but do we hang around to find?
Sometimes the answers are staring right at us. Yet we do not know. We hope to do great things, but sometimes all he wants is the simple things to be done. We want divine revelation, but sometimes all he wants is a childlike faith. We want miraculous signs, but sometimes all he asks for us to know him better.
Maybe the oh so great and grand scheme that I envision God to have planned for me is just something very normal yet so powerful and beautiful, that is to pray.
Saturday, April 8
Tonight Love is Racing
Have you ever heard those kind of Japanese songs? Those kind where they sing in English , but pronounce the words with the Japanese way. Those kind of songs where the lyrics make absolutely no sense whatsoever, but yet the tune is just so catchy and you just can't help but hum to that song, pronounce the words like the Japanese do and sing along to that song.
I'm addicted to some weird Japanese song from an anime series.
'Tonight Love is racing,
Tonight constellation.
Tonight love is racing awayyy'
A snippet of the lyrics. As you can see, it abosolutely makes no sense but for some unknown reason, I just cant stop listening to it...
'Chase a shooting star. Good night, good night,
She's a shooting star, good bye....'
I'm addicted to some weird Japanese song from an anime series.
'Tonight Love is racing,
Tonight constellation.
Tonight love is racing awayyy'
A snippet of the lyrics. As you can see, it abosolutely makes no sense but for some unknown reason, I just cant stop listening to it...
'Chase a shooting star. Good night, good night,
She's a shooting star, good bye....'
Sunday, April 2
UROP or not?
UROP applications are open! I've heard so much about it and I am just anxious to apply for it. But I don't know even know whether i stand a chance to get in at all. There are so many science students out there who are better than me academically and more knowledgeable. I look at my CV (or the lack of it) and think who in this world will have the right mind to hire me?
I really need to pray about this.
Besides that, i am swarmed with work this semester. Having a 25 pt core subject isnt very pleasant. Furthermore, the subject spans from topics such as biochemistry to cellular biology to immuno. It drives me crazy just trying to grasp and comprehend the vastness of what i am learning. Despite that i still see the beauty of science each time I listen to lectures or read the text. It's just interesting to see how perfectly the body works, even up to the molecular level. The intricacies of each cell in the human body. Sometimes i wonder how people can say that something so beautiful and complex such as the human body occured only by a random chance.
Onto another subject, genetics. I sometimes wonder whether I should even do genetics. I have my reasons for doing genetics. Sometimes i wonder does too much knowledge do me harm. I'd rather not have known some facts that i have discovered over the years. Why am I doing genetics? To find out more? Maybe i have found out more than i have wanted to. "Sins of the father"; "being selected against"; Sometimes these thoughts just constantly plague me.
Though i fear for my health, though my future is uncertain, though my questions are unanswered, i'll always know that God is beyond all science, plausible rationalization and all my self doubts and fear.
With every living breath, i will look unto Him.
Hmmm i am thankful for my new, okay maybe not so new cell group. From being in one of the smallest cells last year, I have been thrown into the deep end of the pool again. (It always happens to me. haha) Now my cell is big to say the least with 20+ people. I am thankful for everyone there and i believe that though there may be challenges ahead, things will work out for the better somehow. I have hypothesized that the large numbers are due to the amount of pretty people in the cell. hahaha.
Seriously, Nigel and Chris are just awesome. Their passion for Christ and the fellow man is just contagious sometimes. There's no airs with people like Debs and Tian2. Saying Krystin is knowledgeble is an understatement. Listening to Waihong just inspires me and provokes my thoughts. And there's so many other people that i've yet to know. Sometimes i wonder why am I there. I am really blessed with all this people around me.
Woot been awhile since i blogged this much. Must be the stress accumulating in me with no available outlet. Haven't played any sport this week and there's this test coming up on Tuesday.
Ah nevertheless, its good to be alive.
I really need to pray about this.
Besides that, i am swarmed with work this semester. Having a 25 pt core subject isnt very pleasant. Furthermore, the subject spans from topics such as biochemistry to cellular biology to immuno. It drives me crazy just trying to grasp and comprehend the vastness of what i am learning. Despite that i still see the beauty of science each time I listen to lectures or read the text. It's just interesting to see how perfectly the body works, even up to the molecular level. The intricacies of each cell in the human body. Sometimes i wonder how people can say that something so beautiful and complex such as the human body occured only by a random chance.
Onto another subject, genetics. I sometimes wonder whether I should even do genetics. I have my reasons for doing genetics. Sometimes i wonder does too much knowledge do me harm. I'd rather not have known some facts that i have discovered over the years. Why am I doing genetics? To find out more? Maybe i have found out more than i have wanted to. "Sins of the father"; "being selected against"; Sometimes these thoughts just constantly plague me.
Though i fear for my health, though my future is uncertain, though my questions are unanswered, i'll always know that God is beyond all science, plausible rationalization and all my self doubts and fear.
With every living breath, i will look unto Him.
Hmmm i am thankful for my new, okay maybe not so new cell group. From being in one of the smallest cells last year, I have been thrown into the deep end of the pool again. (It always happens to me. haha) Now my cell is big to say the least with 20+ people. I am thankful for everyone there and i believe that though there may be challenges ahead, things will work out for the better somehow. I have hypothesized that the large numbers are due to the amount of pretty people in the cell. hahaha.
Seriously, Nigel and Chris are just awesome. Their passion for Christ and the fellow man is just contagious sometimes. There's no airs with people like Debs and Tian2. Saying Krystin is knowledgeble is an understatement. Listening to Waihong just inspires me and provokes my thoughts. And there's so many other people that i've yet to know. Sometimes i wonder why am I there. I am really blessed with all this people around me.
Woot been awhile since i blogged this much. Must be the stress accumulating in me with no available outlet. Haven't played any sport this week and there's this test coming up on Tuesday.
Ah nevertheless, its good to be alive.