Second Guess

'It's another one of those days,' I always tell myself. Another one of those thinking days...

Guys can only focus at the task at hand, one thing at a time. I don't even think my brain has the capacity to process so many things. If I focused on a certain task and shut out the rest of the world, when I'm done with it, would I regret anything?

As Reed Richards would put it, ' There are variables....' It's quite amazing how we can factor in so many variables into the most simplest of things. I am guilty of that myself.

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Anyway, I don't know whether this will be an encouragement to anyone reading, but I do struggle with prayer. Sometimes I just sit there alone in the night, and all that happens is silence. Sometimes the words just don't come and I desperately try to pray. Sometimes I just feel that I'm saying empty words to a wall. Sometimes I try to keep focusing, but no matter what, distractions still keep appearing in my head. At times I shout for help, but help never arrives. Sometimes I wake up just feeling that I don't even know God properly at all...

I don't really have any good advice for that except for: Just do it. Just keep praying and going at it with the right attitude... It's not so much about the words we say or what we do, but the its the heart God looks at.

The struggling, the bargaining, the wrestling, the special encounter, the shedding of tears, the agony, the complaining, the joy, the comfort, the peace, the lifting of spirit, the feeling of awe...

Prayer.

There are times when I think that I should be doing more, but I'm always gently chided to pray for others, regardless of the circumstances or my emotions. At the end of the day, it isn't about me....